How to Feed Your Family Vegan Food

Ditching meat, eggs and dairy was a decision I made for myself, but not one my husband and kids are ready to make.  And I don’t intend on forcing this on anyone. Isn’t that what all those other vegans do that everyone makes fun of?

What are we supposed to feed these non-vegans then if we don’t want to buy, prepare, and serve meat anymore?

How does this work then?

You don’t have to go from eating McDonalds to cooking three “whole food plant based” meals a day from scratch for four people overnight. You can, but I personally fizzled out after a few days. It’s exhausting! What makes it worse is when you’re trying to do it for people who just want some chicken fingers or lasagna.

How can you go vegan without making your family just die overnight of protein deficiency? What if they’re allergic to kale and go into anaphylactic shock? Won’t their bones crumble to bits from not drinking milk? What if there are no eyeballs in their hot dogs? Should we just go ahead and call child protective services now?

Well, how do you feed your family vegan food then?

Brace yourselves: there is a way. It’s been three years for me, and like most things, it’s still a work in progress.

Here is what I’ve learned:

1. Center your meals around carbohydrates and vegetables, and have the protein be a quarter of the plate.
2. Replace traditional animal protein in its ground form, think tacos, lasagna, chili and burgers, by using ready made packaged alternatives (there’s so many!) or legumes. Things like chicken breasts and steak are too hard to replicate using vegan alternatives when you’re just starting out.
3. Don’t guilt anyone into eating vegan food, but don’t cook separate non-vegan meals for your family to accommodate their preference. Serve your vegan food with a smile and feel good that you’re doing your best.

Here’s some ideas from vegans we polled online:

• Cook only vegan for them at home, and know they can just choose what they want when we all go out to eat.
• Make the meals vegan, but don’t make a fuss when your spouse (or kids) adds meat to them.
• Don’t buy any animal products at all. If they want it – they’ll have to go get it and make it themselves.
• Suggest to your meat-eating spouse/ roommate/ family member to “batch cook” their meats on Sundays so they can easily add it to their dinners you serve throughout the week.
• Cook vegan for everyone all the time, and if they don’t like it – they won’t starve!
• Remind your family that if they want to add meat, eggs, or dairy to your dinners, they’re welcome to do so, but this is what you made and this is what’s for dinner.

I’ve found that forcing anyone to do something they don’t want to won’t work, and have accepted that our mealtimes and diets won’t be perfect. Maybe they will be one day, but with a full schedule, and my kids approaching adolescence, it’s not perfect right now. And that’s okay. Switching your home from the Standard American Diet to a vegan one can take some finessing.

This doesn’t have to be as hard and rigid as everyone makes it out to be. Taking shortcuts and serving semi-homemade meals is okay. Baby steps still get you where you have to go, and what’s the saying, “one day at a time?” Walk before you run? You’ll find that how to feed your family vegan food is easier then you thought.

Know that being perfect shouldn’t be the goal when you’re starting out. Changing how you and your family eat can challenge your traditions, culture, favorite recipes, your norms, your regular comforts, and your habits. These are the things that will tug at your conscience and make you question why you gave up animal products in the first place.

Just remember why you started, and remind yourself, that you are doing good for yourself and by your family. Your heart is in the right place (backed by troves of scientifically based data, by the way.) For me, I saw how much processed food and animal products my family was eating. I thought if, while at my table, they ate real food, then they will be at least that much healthier. What happens at my table I can control.

Give yourself a little time, and most importantly, a whole lot of grace. You’ll get there soon enough. Let us handle the shortcuts!

For those nights you just can’t manage the negotiating or extra food prep, check out our post on Serving Carnivore Houseguests.